Hannah Murray, best known for her role in Game of Thrones, has spoken about one of the most difficult periods of her life, revealing that she became involved in an exploitative health cult that eventually led to a psychotic episode severe enough to put her in a mental health unit for 28 days.
The 36-year-old actress has detailed her experience in her new memoir, “The Make-Believe: A Memoir of Magic and Madness.”In a recent interview with The Guardian, Murray spoke candidly about the experience and reflected on the lack of critical thinking surrounding wellness culture. “There’s not enough critical thinking about wellness,” she said. “It’s easy to say, ‘Well, that’ll never happen to me,’ but we’re doing ourselves a disservice when we start saying that, because you don’t know.”
How Hannah Murray got involved in the wellness cult
Murray explained that her involvement began when she met an energy healer she refers to as Grace on the set of the 2017 film “Detroit.” The film’s dark, violent subject matter left her shaken, and she found herself quick to open up to Grace. What started as a $150 healing session quickly evolved into promises to activate her “spiritual DNA” using what Grace described as “powerful and ancient tools.”Since Murray was introduced to Grace by someone on set, she didn’t think to question her legitimacy.
She was gradually directed to a series of classes that promised to provide answers to her journey of self-healing, though they always came at a financial cost.“The pyramid was built to exploit everyone who tried to climb it,” she wrote in her memoir. “Except for one person, one man, who sat at the top.” Murray refers to this man as Steve, describing him as magnetic and powerful in a way she has never encountered before.
“He showed strength in a way I had never seen anyone show before. Magical strength,” she recalled. “I knew I was in the presence of a wizard.”
Signs of exploitation and increased anxiety
As she became more involved, Murray said she began to notice signs of sexual exploitation within the organization. “I felt like my own experience was very dramatic, without anything obviously physical going on,” she told the outlet. “There was just this charge of energy in the room.”When she raised concerns that the organization might be a sex cult with one of the teachers, she was told that Steve was simply “really good at crushing your ego.”
The psychotic episode that led to her hospitalization
During a five-day training session held in London, Murray’s behavior became highly erratic. She began speaking at what she described as “a million miles per second,” experienced hallucinations, and developed delusions that Steve loved her and intended to marry her.At her lowest point, Murray recalled locking herself in the bathroom in a state of extreme distress, while teachers on the other side of the door chanted: “Go away, you evil spirit in Hanna.” When help was finally called, she was pinned to the floor and rushed to hospital, where she was detained for 28 days under the Mental Health Act.
Hannah Murray’s diagnosis and why she chose to speak out
After being hospitalized, Murray was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. The diagnosis brought an unexpected sense of clarity, she said.
“Everything made so much sense,” she recalled.She has since spoken out about the stigma surrounding serious mental health experiences, noting that public conversations tend to focus only on anxiety and depression to the exclusion of those who have been compartmentalized. “It was really important for me to say, ‘I’ve been through this.’ A lot of people go through this. “It doesn’t mean they’re bad or bad forever,” she said.Murray’s memoir “The Make-Believe: A Memoir of Magic and Madness” is now available.