Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce reportedly told friends and family in their closely guarded wedding invitation that they have a “no gift-giving at all” policy. Which is beautiful and delicious, and in the case of a celebration expected to attract some of the most famous people on Earth, it’s almost certainly wishful thinking.
When the list is said to include everyone from Selena Gomez and Patrick Mahomes to Gigi Hadid, Stevie Nicks, Tim McGraw, Suki Waterhouse, Paul McCartney and Ed Sheeran, does anyone really believe that all the VIPs have arrived empty-handed? This is the highest known pairing in the world. Surely someone, somewhere, is already panicking and calling the doorman about what the bride can get and the groom who can buy anything.
Swift and Kelsey may have already provided the answer. Before their Madison Square Garden wedding, they donated $26 million to charities including food banks, children’s hospitals and other organizations across the cities they care about, including New York, Nashville and Kansas City. The gesture also had the comforting effect of avoiding any surprise at the scale of the celebrations, which are expected to attract up to 1,000 people. Reports of a folk-style castle within the park are disputed, although the setting is still described as elaborate.
Donating in the couple’s name has the advantage of being personal, delicious, and almost impossible to accuse of being tacky – provided, of course, that the cause is one they actually support.
That’s exactly the goal, says Bruce Weidman of Jasper & James Luxury Gifts, who works with many of Hollywood’s top studios and executives. “A generous contribution to a charity the couple supports – anything else is trite. When people ask about gifts for the wealthy, I’m reminded of Oscar Hammerstein’s lyric ‘How Can Love Survive’ from The Sound of Music, particularly the line: ‘They never get much of anything.’
Other high-profile weddings have dealt with the same problem by directing generosity toward charity. Jeff Bezos and Lauren Sanchez also asked that no gifts be given at their wedding in Venice, and instead told guests that donations were being made on their behalf to the UNESCO office in Venice, Corella and the Venice International University. When Prince Harry and Meghan Markle married in 2018, they reportedly had to return millions of dollars worth of gifts because royal rules restricted the acceptance of anything that could be considered a commercial promotion, although charitable donations linked to the causes they support were allowed.
However, philanthropy may not stop everyone from wanting to send a tangible gift. For those intent on wrapping something physical, gift experts say the trick is to avoid anything that only advertises its own price. If the recipients can already buy it, the only reason to give it is because it feels personal.
“The best gifts for people who have everything are not those that money can buy, but those that money cannot easily re-gift,” says Hollywood gift expert Nicole Pollard Baim of LaLaLuxe. “The best gifts are the most personal.” Her suggestions include a digital art frame from IONNYK, planting trees in a national park through the National Park Foundation or a custom travel box from Eva Joan Repair.
The best deals tend to be more intimate than extravagant, says Jacqueline Siena India, founder of Sienna Charles, a concierge company that handles the travel and lifestyle needs of clients worth $1 billion or more. “No matter how rich people are, they are still emotional individuals who love the simple things in life,” she says. “Taylor loves gardening, arts, crafts, reading, decorating her home, etc. If someone knows her on a personal level, they will know the more intimate side of her and gift giving will be easy.”
Which may be why the safest gift for Swift and Kelce isn’t the flashiest. Donating works because it respects the no-gift request. A handmade or personalized gift only works if it indicates an actual acquaintance of the couple. The risk for anyone shopping at this height is sending something expensive that doesn’t say as much about the bride and groom as it does about the sender.
For most of us, wedding gift etiquette is to know whether or not the bride and groom already own a blender. For Swift and Kelsey’s inner circle, the question is trickier: What do you buy for two people who can afford the store?
